The Pumaman [1980]

With the popularity of superhero films, we decided to get on board with the trend! I think we missed the boat though somehow?

Pumaman starts with a title card informing us that the Aztecs believed in a puma god and that god did, in fact, deliver a pumaman to the world . . . with aliens. Gods apparently weren't enough. That pumaman begot a son, our current pumaman, who has no idea of his celestial origins. Some latex wearing "archeologists" discover a gold Aztec mask and the evil one uses it to control the girl one. She crosses paths with pumaman and we get to experience their painful flirting. Pumaman at one point jumps out of a window to avoid an attacker and lands on his feet. Turns out the attacker was actually there to find the pumaman and help him. Do not question why pumaman is white and his helper appears to actually be of native descent, which would make more sense for pumaman if he's related to an Aztec god (but he's actually an alien? I don't know). Pumaman is given a belt that allows him to fly (you know, a thing pumas can do) and then has to try to take down the evil guy who wants to control the world with oil. He can also portal jump and stop his heart to appear dead, other common puma behaviors. His helper gets taken by the bad men and actually destroys the mind controlling mask, making it pretty easy to take down the evil man from there. The film ends with the aliens being called and pumaman basically announcing that he and the girl are going to screw to make the next pumaman. 

This was a tough one. The first half of the movie had a lot of really funny moments including bad special effects and incredibly strange lines. It does start to drag a bit in the second half though after pumaman has realized his mission. For that reason, this film is on the cusp. Watch it if you want, it won't really waste your time, but if it doesn't sound like your thing, skipping it is okay too. If you're really unsure, there's apparently an MST3K episode about it, which might soften the blow.

Oh, and there's no Aztec puma god; just a jaguar one. Why could he not be jaguar man? It would make equally as much sense.

Spoon Rating: 4.5