We're Your Parents [2025]

In our exploration of vertical media, we decided to try a completely different genre: horror. This film is very short at only about a half hour but it took us nearly an hour just to find the version of this film showing all the parts in the correct order. It was ultimately kind of a waste of time because while we got a few laughs, it really wasn't worth the effort.

A girl returns home for Thanksgiving with her parents who are acting weird. They give her cranberry sauce that seems to drug her and when she wakes up they are still acting weird. She pieces together that there is something going on in the basement, and the reveal is that her real parents are tied up there with their eyes sewn shut and the stand-ins are evil clones who wanted to use her DNA to make a new baby. That is the level of explanation we get. It's kind of Coraline but lazier. The girl's dads die and she defeats the evil mom. The end.

We probably would have been better off with A Boyfriend For The Homophobic Alpha or Cry Your Eyes Out On My Tomb or something.

Spoon Rating: 4