It's not often that we end up watching a movie that all of us have seen before, albeit some haven't seen it in so long that the memory of it is pretty faded.Don't worry. It all comes back with the first whiny line uttered by Chris O'Donnell: "I want a car! Chicks dig the car!" That perfectly sets the tone for a film were Robin is going through some sort of delayed puberty, Batman is a smirking bobblehead played by the surprisingly human George Clooney, Batgirl is Alfred's niece with a lack of British accent and a bike thief, and the two main villains, Mr. Freeze and Poison Ivy, don't even bother speaking unless they can work in a stupid pun relating to their villain theme (Bane, sorta villain number three, can thankfully only grunt single words as communication). Although it's not just the acting and script that's terrible. Gotham itself looks like an LSD-nightmare of a city with illogical architecture, rubber icicles, and gangs that wear glow-in-the-dark paint or literally came directly out of Kubrick's "A Clockwork Orange." Aside from shaming director Joel Schumacher for reminding us of a good movie we could be watching, we also shouted out his name in exasperation with every unnecessary Dutch angle and shameful cliche line that didn't even have a pun in it.
This movie besmirches the good name of Batman and the name of Batman movies for which we can only be thankful that this movie is mostly bookended by Tim Burton's films and Christopher Nolan's (with the exception of "Batman Forever" which is pretty bad but acceptable in comparison to this one).
Adam's Grandma's Review: "A little too long. I could have taken a nap with that one."
No comments:
Post a Comment