Catwoman [2004]

[Cross-posted on the Bad Movie Night Facebook page.]

It's hard to believe that 2004 was ten years ago but in case you've forgotten some of the worst things about movies of the early 00's, thankfully we have this piece of bad movie history to remind you of it. The Marvel comics movie craze had really kicked off two years earlier with Sam Raimi's "Spiderman" and DC wouldn't have any movies even close to being as notable as that until 2005's "Batman Begins". For now, they tried "Catwoman" which seems to steal from "Spiderman" in ways ranging from origin, transformation, coloration of the film, CGI, and even the way she leaps around buildings. It's also another great example of post-feminism and faux female empowerment (see: the "Charlie's Angels" review) with some kind of mythology that makes no sense (women=cats).

In Epcot Gotham, our hero starts out as an awkward and submissive (a requirement of superhero movies of this era) marketing employee designing an ad for an anti-aging cream who is suddenly being stalked by an uncharacteristically attached cat. This cat is her guardian angel cat who brings her back to life after she finds out that the cream is evil and the executives tried to kill her to keep their secret. Once she's revived, she takes on some cat tendencies like superhuman gymnastic abilities, a craving for tuna, and the desire to eat freshly dead people's faces (not really, but wouldn't that be great?). She gets fired for cat napping at the office, walks around on catwalks, and then steals some jewels like a cat burgler and weirdly doesn't remember doing it. They aren't really clear on whether Catwoman is an alter ego or a dissociative personality. As we all do, she taps into her power by wearing black leather, cutting her hair, carrying a whip, and defeating an evil Sharon Stone with an unbreakable face. There's some useless annoying coworker side characters and a disposable love interest played by the guy who played every cop love interest in female-lead films of the early 00s. Also, everyone let out a loud groan when she first described something as "puuuuuurrfect." It was bad but at least it had a plot which made it far more tolerable than last week.

Keith requested that we end the evening with a round of "Jingle Cats" but he was mercifully outvoted.

And to pad out this review a bit, here are some pictures of the cats of Bad Movie Night:

Alice (R.I.P.)

Adam's Nickname: Bitch

Theme Song: "All By Myself" by Eric Carmen

Roxy

Adam's Nickname: Pathetic 

Theme Song: "Lovefool" by The Cardigans

Nico

Adam's Nickname: Battered Housewife

Theme Song: "I Hate Everything About You" by Three Days Grace

Quote: "I'm a woman. I'm used to doing things I don't wanna do."

Adam's Grandma's Review: "I liked it. Had a lot of action in it."