Megalopolis [2024]

Having watched a review or two about this movie, I knew that it was insane but I somehow still didn't know what it was about. I knew it was a decades long passion project by Francis Ford Coppola. I knew it was based on this idea of America as an allegory for Ancient Rome based on an actual part of Roman history. I knew who was in it. But I figured in order to actually understand it, I would need to watch it. That did not help.

I don't know how to explain the plot to someone else, but I can tell you the themes are everywhere: written on buildings and in title cards spoken by Lawrence Fishburne so you kind of feel like Morpheus is explaining the purpose to you. That being said, the movie doesn't seem to actually convey these themes, which is why they are explained to you. There's references up the wazoo that are maybe meant to service these ideas but just don't: Hamlet, Henry II's Bishop of Canterbury thing, Marcus Aurelius, Nazi Germany. I mean, I like history and literature too, Frank. The film also has a lot of visual language. A lot. Too much you might say. It's a lot of film styles mixed together that lead to us comparing certain shots to Sin City and others to The Cook, The Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover. It was futuristic in a cheap CGI meets Art Deco way, while also looking like Ancient Rome circa 1950s epics: gladiator heels with square diamonds. In a way, I liked the aesthetic. In a way, I hated it terribly.

Here's my best attempt at explaining the plot of film, but you have to imagine it more like a bunch of vignettes in the same universe. Caesar Catalina is an architect/scientist/guy-who-can-stop-time who wants to create a permanent city of the future that will be a utopia for all. His rival is Mayor Cicero who likes the status quo and focusing on the now and also hates Caesar because he was the DA when Caesar was accused of killing his wife. Cicero's daughter, Julia, falls for Caesar's vision and him and they eventually get married and have a kid so Cicero gets over his hatred.. The Megalopolis utopia is funded by Caesar's rich uncle Crassus who ends up marrying Caesar's ex named, I kid you not, Wow Platinum, who just wants money. She seduces Crassus' grandson Clodio, who becomes something of a Trump allegory but is taken down by supporters of Caesar's utopia. Everyone is happy. The future is secured. You would not believe how much filler I left out in this explanation. This movie is over two hours long.

Because of it's length, this is a hard movie to recommend, but it has some genuinely funny acting moments (bless Aubrey Plaza who is just here to have fun) and so much nonsense that you are consistently mesmerized and confused. Possibly a good one if you're on drugs? 

With all its on-the-nose themes it really feels like the true meaning of this film is, if you have been trying to make something work for over 30 years and it still isn't coming together, maybe just stop.

Spoon Rating: 4