May I present to you our first Cynthia Rothrock movie, the female Van Damme but a better actor for those of you not in the know. This movie had been a chosen last week but the timing of our choice was paired up with a particularly big moment in sports as Ronda Rousey, formerly undefeatable, was finally beaten by Holly Holm in a UFC fight last weekend. So our pre-show for "Undefeatable" was watching the YouTube clip of someone who was formerly undefeatable, being defeated. Gotta love irony. Unfortunately, Keith and Grandma were not present to indulge with us but after this movie we can guarentee more Cynthia Rothrock films in the future.Cynthia is part of a street fighting gang who challenges other gangs and makes money from it, something she does in order to pay for her sister's college tuition after the death of their parents. In the other plot, a women who is being raped and beaten by her underground street fighter husband leaves him and he has a complete mental breakdown. While Cynthia is trying not to get arrested by a kung fu fighting cop who wishes she would get on the straight and narrow, street fighter guy, called Stingray, is going around torturing and murdering girls who look like his wife and keeping their eyes in his fish tank. Eventually Stingray murders Rothrock's sister and revenge must be had. While the cop interviews Stingray's wife's psychiatrist (who was also a professor of Rothrock's sister), Cynthia goes out to beat up guys she knows who beat up women. When the psychiatrist also gets kidnapped by Stingray, they are finally able to track him down and have two separate fights at a warehouse after they save the psychiatrist once and she gets kidnapped again while in the hospital. At one point Stingray and the cop pause while fighting to rip their shirts off and flex. Also Cynthia's unnecessary split count is four in cause you wanted to know. The movie ends with Cynthia and her gang forcibly enrolled in college that they probably can't pay for so they all high five in a fake freeze frame where they all just stand really still for a few seconds.
This is a delightfully dumb martial arts movie with a nonsensical title, practice sequences for no particular reason (sometimes with hook swords!), and so many bad actors. When I said in the beginning that Cynthia Rothrock is a better actor than Van Damme, I'm really not exaggerating and she is also by far the best actor in this movie. There's plenty of bad dialogue but more than that, it's the inexplicable way that people say things. Every actor in this movie needs a pot of coffee and some ability at faking human emotions. All in all, would Rothrock again.
Quotes:
"Can I help you?"
"Sure. Your money."
"They were a bunch of punks."
"Now they're a bunch of crackheads and theydoanythingtheywant!!!"
"Where were you?"
[holds up sword] "I've been busy."
[After Stingray has both his eyes gouged out]
"We'll keep an eye out for you, Stingray."
"Yeah. See ya."
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