Chuck E. Cheese In The Galaxy 5000 [1999]

Since we just had Halloween (where we watched the original Hellraiser instead of a bad movie), we couldn't think of anything scarier than this: Chuck E. Cheese In The Galaxy 5000. Although obviously this was made for children, it has such a strange vibe it's hard to think of what parents would actually decide on this film to show their kids. Also strange is that apparently Chuck and his buddies (Helen the chicken and love interest, the Texan dog Jasper, the purple alien Mr. Munch, and Pasquale the Italian stereotype) are all in a band, which would clearly make for a better story than this.

The plot is that Pasquale introduces a kid named Charlie to the crew because he needs $50,000 to help his aunt and uncle replace their tractor. Farming is actually a motif in this movie for some reason (was the franchise established by a farmer?). The crew decides to enter into a race on another planet to win the prize money. Sure. Sounds easy. There they meet two very queer German bodybuilders and a stereotypical blonde who is into Chuck. Helen tries to make Chuck jealous using the gays who then lock her up after explaining their evil plan to win the race with zoom gas, designed by a mad scientist named Dr. Zoom. Apparently it makes you go fast but think slow so it's probably a drug allegory. Team Cheese ends up winning the race after Chuck gets some training from Pasquale in disguise as a Scottish stereotype. There are a lot of bad songs. Blonde goes off with the bodybuilders, which means she has no gaydar and is presumably into three ways. Dance party!

This movie was actually pretty fun to watch. It's stupid enough to make fun of easily and doesn't really drag at a swift one hour timestamp. 

Spoon Rating: 5