Tuesday, February 28, 2017

Dark Angel [1990]

[Cross-posted on the Bad Movie Night Facebook page.]

As it has probably been mentioned before, the Bad Movie Night crew are collectively into Dolph Lundgren and will watch anything with him in it. Even a stereotypical 90s cop movie with the added bonus of drug dealer aliens. You're welcome. For the reference, the reason why the title of this post and the title on the poster don't match is because the film was originally called "Dark Angel" but then after realizing that there were already two movies by that name (and many more things eventually after this movie was released), they decided to rename it "I Come In Peace." This title both makes more sense and is highly inaccurate.

Near Christmas, an alien comes down to Earth for unknown purposes initially outside of killing people with a weapon shaped like a CD. He is also only capable of saying, "I come in peace" in spite of this being incredibly false. The Christmas concept is quickly dropped for being to reminiscent of "Die Hard" and we are introduced to our main characters. Dolph Lundgren is a cop who failed to save his partner from getting killed in an attempted heroin bust. He gets paired up with obnoxious overachieving rookie and they try to solve the mystery of how everyone involved in the bust was killed with this mysterious CD object and why all the heroin disappeared. They take the CD to a scientist who is so hopped up on caffeine and other drugs that he can't stop fidgeting and screaming randomly in order to relax. He can't really explain it. Soon we are given enough intercut scenes of the alien injecting people with heroin and then extracting a fluid from them which we realize is endorphins, thanks to a random discussion by Lundgren's semi-girlfriend who's a coroner, that we realize he is a drug dealer from the stars. He also has an alien cop who speaks English chasing after him but he dies after losing too much cream filling. Lundgren and rookie track down the alien and defeat him. Earth is saved but only in a highly specific way.

This movie was pretty amusing. If you take out the alien part, it's your typical 90s action movie right down to the music choices and the font of the opening titles. 

"I like abuse as much as the next girl."

"Who's that guy?"
"Some asshole from outer space."

"I come in peace."
"And you go in pieces, asshole."

Spoon Rating: 4

No comments:

Post a Comment